Light! Air! Water!

After some good rains in the past month, the hillside is greening once more. The heat of the summer had dried up all the brush and browned the landscape. The plant life is now celebrating the arrival of winter rains with vigour. On this cool morning, I was on my way home after a pleasant stroll enjoying all the shades of green.

When I reached home, something in the porch caught my eye. For weeks I had been looking at the completely dried up potted braided ficus plant with some guilt. Somehow or other, I had neglected it and it had died. All the leaves were dry and brown. One by one they were dropping off. The branches were dry enough to be snapped off. But today I was surprised to see a little green shoot from the bottom of the stem. I thought it was a weed which had found a foothold in the pot but no, incredibly the ficus was reviving. I had seen a couple of big trees being cut down in the neighbourhood in the last two months and that was a sad thing to see. The revival of this little plant seemed a small consolation for that.

In the following days, the plant started putting out more and more leaves and just like that the new shoots covered the main trunk from top to bottom. The ficus is said to be temperamental. I have read that if you move the plant to a new location, the shock could cause it to wither. But I guess this little tree is more resilient than that.

Desert in Bloom

Life is persistent and vigorous. Given the slightest encouragement, plants will sprout anywhere. This past year, we had a good deal of rain. As a result the desert put out a spectacular display of wildflowers in spring as you can see in this picture below where the usual desolate brown earth had been replaced by a yellow carpet. The seeds lie dormant in the desert soil and burst into life every once in a few years when rains are plenty and occur at the right time. 2019 was one such year. The desert super bloom as it was called was quite impressive. The California poppies too had a bumper season and their display simply took one's breath away. If the rainy trend continues, we may be looking at another year of such blooms.

California Poppies

The more I think about plants the more I feel they are magical. I mean,  they convert air, light and water into stalk, trunk, branch, leaves, flowers and fruits. Some trees grow hundreds of feet tall on just air and water. Plants are at the start of the food chain and nourish and sustain everything else. Even a log from a dead tree on the forest floor supports teeming insect colonies.

No wonder Krishna was moved to say (Srimad Bhagavatham 10.22 Verses 33-35), 'Look how these trees support every living entity! Like noble souls, they willingly give to those who seek everything they have - leaves, flowers, fruits, shade, roots, bark and wood. Also, fragrance, sap, shoots, and even ashes. Everyone should emulate their behaviour towards other living beings with one's life, wealth, intelligence and words'.

Trees are some of the oldest living things on earth. Some can live for 3000 years or even longer. The massive redwoods and sequoias in California are a good example. They are also among the largest. They can grow to more than 250 feet with the first branch at 80 feet and can be as thick as 30 feet in diameter.  It can take a day and a half for water to reach the top branches from the roots. All this growth comes from water and air for the earth beneath does not get depleted as the tree grows. Think about it. Just light, air, and water! And you get these giants. What more can I say?

Banyan trees do not grow as tall as the redwoods but a single tree can spread over several acres. It is clearly not a tree for your backyard unless you want your house to be swallowed up! There are examples of banyans growing around structures pretty much covering them. In fact, the tree starts life with its little seed germinating in a crevice on a host tree. And as it grows, it often completely covers the host pretty much smothering it. For this reason, the banyan is also known as the strangler fig.

Yes, the banyan does belong to the ficus family as does the little plant in the pot in my porch. I am going to leave it in the pot just to be safe.

How to Take The Joy Out Of Cooking

"I like work. It fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours" (from Three Men In A Boat by Jerome K. Jerome)

I think this can apply to cooking too if you consider cooking to be work. I suppose cooking can be a joy if you only have to do it occasionally. But either way there is a fascination with the process of cooking as evidenced by the numerous cooking shows on TV with entire channels dedicated to the culinary arts.

I have watched these shows for a number of years now. In the beginning, they did provide instructions and demonstrations and one could learn a thing or two. I even got inspired to attempt some dishes. But it is hard to have a dedicated channel  going all day in this fashion. Soon came the contests and competitions, wars and battles as the shows are billed. And now they have pretty much taken over with each new show trying to become more bizarre than the next. They can still be entertaining at times though.

In one show, incongruent ingredients are thrown at the participants who have to make a dish out of them. There was another where the participants could sabotage one another. There is always a time limit along with additional conditions. Dramatic music and side bars with contestants are added to build tension and emotions. Many contestants have some sad back story or a serious challenge they overcame. All in all, the show could be about sewing or cabinet building as much as about cooking. If you hope to learn any recipes from these, they can only be recipes for disaster.

Here's the format for many of the culinary 'battles' and 'wars' that are constantly being fought on television. The contestants are given a random set of ingredients which must be incorporated in a dish they will make for the judges. Sometimes a twist is added in the middle by way of a new ingredient or condition. After three rounds of elimination, a winner emerges.

Let me paint a typical scenario for you (okay, I will admit that this has not actually come up but if it does, do remember that you saw it here first!).

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'Alright, contestants. You have thirty minutes to wow the judges with your take on a dessert using these ingredients - apples, banana peels, potato chips and castor oil. In addition to these, you have access to our full pantry but these must be incorporated in some way. So get set, on your mark and go!' so saying the host flags off the round.

The participants scurry into the pantry to grab the other items to make their dish sort of edible. Dramatic music fills the speakers and cuts to each contestant with them explaining what they plan to do. 'I am making ice-cream using pureed banana peels and chopped apples. I have no idea what to do with the castor oil', 'I got this. My grandma used to cook banana peels all the time and she used castor oil as a secret ingredient',  'Oh my god, castor oil! Is it even safe to use in cooking? I don't know what I am going to do' and so on. In between, you get to know that one of them was in a serious accident and another beat cancer.

The judges are discussing the ingredients. 'This is tough. Banana peels are bad enough but castor oil? I dread what we are going to be served'. The host of the show joins them and asks, 'Isn't castor oil a laxative? I hope these guys don't go crazy with it'. Interestingly, the host never tastes any of the dishes leading me to think that perhaps he/she has not not signed a waiver indemnifying the producers. I mean I cannot imagine that there are not a few nasty side effects from eating the dishes served up in these competitions. But the judges never tell! I suppose there is also a non-disclosure clause involved.

Half way through, the host calls out, 'Okay, chefs. Come and get the secret ingredient for today. You have to use this in your desserts'. More dramatic music, groans from participants as they hurry to pick up the brown paper bags. 'Wait, my bag is empty!', 'So is mine', 'Is this a joke?' fly the comments. The host with a deadpan expression tells them that the bag itself is the secret ingredient leaving them stunned.

'Now this is a first' comments one judge to the next. 'Well, paper is just cellulose and is not really harmful, you know', assures the host but there is apprehension in the judges' eyes as they wonder if they are biting off more than they can chew (yeah, pun intended).

Finally comes the part for which the host is best trained. He starts the count down in a thundering tone, 'Ten, nine, eight..'  and so on and concludes, 'one, time's up! Step away from your dish!'

'Chef Joe, you are up first. Tell us what you have made' 'I have made an apple pie with fried banana peel strips dipped in chocolate on top. The chips and castor oil have been used in the crust' 'What about the paper bag?' 'I burnt it and added the ash to the filling' 'Wow, what a transformation! But let's taste the pie' 'I am not getting any taste of the ash but the castor oil is not a nice flavour here' says one judge. 'Yes, it could have been toned down', agrees another.

Next up is Chef Molly. She has ground up the peels and some of the paper bag into the ice-cream. 'I perfumed the castor oil with spices and drizzled a few drops on top' 'That's sheer genius! But I cannot really taste the paper bag' (No kidding, I am thinking. What do you expect?) 'Still, I am loving the ice-cream. Well done'

The third chef has made some kind of apple crisp. The topping includes strips of the paper bag that have been dipped in cinnamon sugar and flash fried. Again, great transformation but the paper is somehow still chewy once the sugar melts in the judges' mouths. All in all, a creditable dish still it seems.

The final chef has made a really good dessert but he seems to have left out the peels and the castor oil. As for the paper bag, he has served the dish in the bags. Now, leaving out one ingredient may get a pass but three, come on, you are asking to be eliminated. When quizzed why he left them out, he says, 'Well, someone had to say the emperor has no clothes on. As far as I am concerned, banana peels and paper are not food and castor oil does not belong in a dessert. And I served this in the paper bags so that you can at least take away something edible with you'.

Can You Hold Please?

'All our representatives are busy assisting other customers. Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line and your call will be answered by the next available representative', said the nondescript voice over the phone. This may give the impression that there is an army of reps answering calls from customers. But what if there are only a handful? And I have called at a busy time? How long will I have to wait? How do I know I am the next in line to be helped? This creates an annoyance. Calling to make a complaint already predisposes me to be unhappy and the wait is only aggravating the situation.

I resign myself to a long wait. To make things worse, instead of playing some boring music, this company has decided to use the waiting time to pitch more of their products and services. Clever use of multiple recorded messages fools me into thinking that my call was at last being answered every time a new message starts off. It takes a while to realize this which, need I say, adds more to my frustration. I try to focus on the fact that the call is being paid for by the company and the longer I am waiting, the more it costs the company. One can take some small consolation in that.

'Can you hold, please?' is something we all remember from calling any service or business - airlines, doctor's office, bank, telephone company, hardware store, etc. etc. But being greeted by a human being and then put on hold is actually better than being greeted by an automated response which then puts you on hold. I suspect that in the first case your wait time is going to be less. If the business has not invested in an automated call management system, they may not be getting flooded with too many calls. A receptionist or an operator can handle them. At least that is what I think.

Given that the system unwittingly adds to the frustration of the callers, I think we must spare a thought to the poor service rep who has to face their wrath at the end of a long wait. It is certainly not his/her fault. I often remind myself of this and refrain from ranting at the rep.

Sometimes you are given an estimated wait time before your turn comes up. If you are told that you have to wait fifteen minutes, you may decide that it is too long and hang up. Perhaps this is the intent - to discourage customers from staying on the phone. Perhaps I am being too cynical. Knowing how long you have to wait is not a bad thing after all. Surely that is helpful.

There are companies that actually tell you that you are the fifth or sixth or whatever in the queue. The best way I have seen this being handled is when you are offered the choice of waiting or having your call returned. You are given an estimate of when to expect the call too. Of course, this will also save the company from paying telephone charges for waiting time. Win-win I suppose, if you can call it that.

Whatever be the system, it would seem we are at the mercy of the company but this post will not be complete if I don't tell you about the time I was able to return the favour. I was about to move to San Diego and had called the phone company to have a service established there. I was just not able to even get through, let alone being put on hold. After getting a busy signal a number of times, I tried different numbers that I could find. Finally, I got through and a voice answered at the other end. It took me a few seconds to realize that it was actually a person and not a recording.

I was happy that I got through at last and told the rep that I wanted to establish a new service in San Diego. My heart fell when he said that I had reached Pacific Bell of North CA but I should call PB of Southern CA. I told him in the nicest possible way with more than a tinge of sarcasm that if he knew of a way of getting through to them, I would love to hear it and was ready to hang up. But miraculously, and I am not making this up, he said he was transferring the call to the appropriate person!

Thus I was able to get to the right representative. While I was talking to him, I got a call and said to him, 'Can you hold, please? I am getting another call' barely giving it a second thought. It only hit me when a few minutes later I got another call and was able to put him on hold again, smiling to myself in smug satisfaction. It had been a stressful day and my failed attempts to get through to the phone company had only made things worse. But now I forgot all the frustrations of the day. In fact, it turned out to be a day to recall with fondness. How often do I get to put the telephone company on hold?

Just Scroll On

I have never been active in social media. I am not part of any group that I actually joined. But not long ago I was added to a couple of alumni groups and I remain part of them mostly in a passive mode.I do enjoy staying in touch with my friends and the odd forwards now and then but I must confess that I find myself quite unable to keep up with the torrent of messages.

Many of my classmates in these groups reside in India and when I wake up in the morning they have already been posting at a good clip for many hours. Not having been in the middle of it all, I feel like I have arrived late to the party. On a typical day, I open up WhatsApp and find there are more than one hundred messages waiting to be read. I realize that I will not be able to read them without being late to work. There are several videos too that have been forwarded which will take even more time to watch.  I skip many messages especially those that just share a link without any context or comment just sliding the thumb down the screen.

The messages themselves come in random order so it is difficult to follow any particular thread. One of them catches my eye and interest but if I reply to that, I will be taken to the last message. Besides, what if someone else has already made the same point I am going to make? Maybe I should go through the rest of the messages to be sure. But I don't want to keep thumbing back and forth. You see my problem? Anyway, by the time I reach the end the urge to reply has usually dissipated. So I end up not replying most of the time.

I really admire those that are willing to type long messages in these apps. Some are merely forwarding stuff but there a few prolific texters (I am assuming they are typing on the phone). I also see that they are passionate about what they are posting. As for me, even with autocomplete, I find it tedious to type out long messages. Without that feature, I probably would keep to monosyllables.

Speaking of monosyllables, I must mention the emoticons that show up on the messages. Sometimes the entire message is just a couple of symbols. Not knowing which message prompted that response, I am left scratching my head (is there an emoji for that?). All I can say is that the rather grim previous message could not have drawn that response. You can probably tell that I am quite a novice with this thing but so are many others in the group, it appears.

Every now and then I find that I learn something new or gain a new perspective. We can easily go through our lives not reading or watching news or articles that run contrary to our political positions. The group exposes you to such views and on the whole I think that's a good thing. The discussions can become overheated especially when religion or politics is concerned. Unfortunately, sometimes it can even get personal and uncivil. I am intrigued to find that people who have not really been in constant touch are able to use strong language talking to one another. It is quite clear that we did not get to know all facets of our classmates even of some close friends during the time we spent in college. In the many decades that have gone by people have changed. Views which may or may not have been apparent back then have clearly evolved. We were a diverse group then and are still diverse probably more entrenched in our positions now.

One of the great things about the group is that makes it easy to get together with friends when travelling to different cities. They are always up for a lunch or dinner at scant notice and the resulting meet up is without fail enjoyable. We feel transported back to our days on campus where a special bond and camaraderie were forged among us. So we mark the occasion with a group photo or two. The waiter snaps them and one of us will share it on, what else, WhatsApp. Someone comments on how so and so has not changed at all. Many others respond with an emoji or two. But then there are others who want to know who is who in the picture proving that we have either changed enough or just gotten old and forgotten the faces or never knew a few of our classmates. I will leave you to decide which.

The Line That Elevates

The grocery store was crowded. All the checkout counters had several people waiting in line. I surveyed the lines to see which one would be the quickest. I could not go to the express counter as I had too many items. Should I join the one with the least number of people? Looking at their overflowing baskets, I decided against it. Those who study the psychology of queues (yes, there is such a thing) will tell you this decision making is a bit stressful. Nothing is more irritating than seeing other lines move faster when yours crawls. I don't know about your experience but the other lines always move faster. That's the law of the supermarket. And the other line moves faster until you join it!

I watched the cashier at the next counter gabbing away with a customer while people waiting there were clearly getting annoyed. 'Price check, counter three', blared a voice over the PA. I realized that it was now my turn to get annoyed as this was going to hold up my line. I wondered why the grocery store did not have a single line with multiple counters serving them. It is well established that such a system makes for faster throughput. Having multiple lines also violates that most cardinal principle of the queue - first come first served. I suppose it is a question of space.

A queue can evoke memories of times of shortages and rationing. Even when there are no shortages, the suggestion of limited supplies galvanizes people to rush to the stores. The (in)famous Black Friday sales cause stampedes because the insane discounts may be gone in the first few hours of the store opening. Even online sites may get overwhelmed by the traffic. Amusement parks get crowded and their star attractions have long waiting times to get in. The more popular it is, the more crowd it pulls. You do not want to miss it in the limited hours at your disposal.

The arrival of a new model of smartphone results in people camping out overnight to be the first ones to get their hands on one. I don't understand this though. It's not like Apple going to stop selling the phones after one day. Somewhat paradoxically, it is a competitive urge - wanting to be the first to get the new model of the phone or get that new Harry Potter book or be the first to see a new movie that motivates people here rather than any need for fairness.

When one sees people lining up outside a restaurant, the natural assumption is that it is a popular place to eat. Otherwise, why would people want to wait in line rather than go somewhere where they can satisfy their hunger quickly? I guess the hunger of the affluent is different from that of someone who is unsure where his next meal is going to come from or when.

Regardless of the reason, an orderly queue gives us the confidence that the process will be fair. So any attempt to cut in front is met with a strong collective response from those waiting. People seem capable of self-organization in these situations. Queues work well as long as there is the assurance that there is adequate supply to meet the demand. Absent that, the situation can descend into chaos.

I used to take the bus for a while when I was in Bombay. Everyone had assured me that the queue worked at the bus stops there. However, my experience was different. While there seemed to be a line of sorts waiting for the bus, the moment the bus was spotted, things changed. People surged forward to the front and swarmed the rear entrance. The conductor would then declare how many could get in and blocked any more from getting in. And in an amazing deference to the man in uniform, the crowd would fall back. But clearly, the line discipline was gone since the demand far exceeded the supply.

Long ago (at least it seems that way), before there was online reservation for train tickets, booking a train journey was a project in itself. In Bombay, the approach of the summer vacation meant wending one's way to Victoria Terminus (if you were travelling to the south as I used to) a month in advance and waiting in line to make the reservation. The railways made special arrangements to handle the rush.There was a separate booking hall for certain trains and counters were set up to handle specific trains. Some trains needed two counters because of their popularity - one for odd dates and one for even dates. Extra coaches were added during this time as families wanted go back to their native towns or villages that were usually a day and a half's journey away.

Air travel involves lines at every turn. You may be able to book your ticket online or through an agent but you have to wait in line to check your bags in. Then there is the security check. At the gate again you may have to join a queue for boarding. After all that, during the flight if you want to use the toilet, there is a line for it too. When you get off, you may have to go through immigration counter. A lot of standing and waiting indeed.

Waiting permeates every aspect of our lives. At the bus stop, the train station, the post office, the fast food counter - you have lines everywhere. Fast food eateries often have a 'drive thru' option but then you have a line of cars waiting with their engines running. Even temples are not exempt from this. Some gods it would seem are more popular than others among the devotees. The faithful are willing to stand in line patiently for hours to get the darshan of the deities at such temples. Those that cannot afford to wait are able to take the fast lane if they can afford the requisite fee. It is kind of ironic when you think that a queue is supposed to level the field. I wonder if god discounts the devotion in proportion to the fee! 

As I waited for my turn at the checkout, I wondered if queues were not a great symbol of civilization. Somehow at some point in time we human beings decided that we would wait in line to be served on a first-come-first basis instead of letting the fittest survive so to speak. We accept and expect that the queue ensures equity and efficiency. Notwithstanding its limitations, one might say that the queue is the line that elevates us to civilization from barbarism.